Basically, Run
by FlyingMintBunny2
Summary: Arthur Kirkland was one to stay at home rather that going to conventions. Wait, what? What to conventions have to do with anything? And why is his neighbor there? What is the meaning of this? Human AU USUK, FranPana, OC Panama(Reina)


**Hello! So, basically, the idea for this oneshot came from a pickup line that my friend said and, being the person that I am, I came up with a stupid idea for a oneshot. **

**... Enjoy... Or not...**

* * *

Arthur Kirkland was the type of person to stay home and watch Doctor who with a refreshing cup of tea. So, why was it that he was at a convention, of all things, dressed as the 10th doctor?

The answer's pretty simple, honestly.

Arthur Kirkland was _not_ and is not the type of person to back down from a challenge.

You must be confused. Reasonably so, I presume. You must be wondering 'What challenge?' Well, my friend, I was getting to that.

I assume you are well aware that Arthur is acquainted with a certain flamboyant, pompous, womanizing Frenchman that Arthur has oh-so-kindly graced with the nickname 'frog'?

Yes?

Excellent.

On to the point... Said Frenchman has... footage from a certain night in which a certain Brit went along with a stupid idea to go pubbing(illegally) with the Bad Touch Trio.

In short, the night involved going to a pub, Francis hooking up with some random tipsy woman, getting kicked out, and a game of strip poker that Arthur would not admit to losing(quite horribly, I might add).

That's besides the point, though. ... Except for the strip poker part. That plays into the point.

Ahem... So, during the game of strip poker, a drunken Arthur was arguing with a tipsy Francis about a few British shows.

Flashback from that night:

_"Doctor Who is the bess shooow in the wuurl!", Arthur slurred as he pulled off his graphic tee._

_Francis rose a perfectly manicured eyebrow as he swirled around his wine and spoke with a French accent that was thickened by the alcohol, "I thought Sherlock was the best show in the world."_

_Arthur looked a little bit offended along with a little bit impressed with the Frenchman, "Sherlock may be a good show, but nuthin' rivals good ol' Doctor Who!"_

_Francis then grinned diabolically, "Are you willing to bet on that?"_

_Arthur responded without hesitation, "Of course, ye frog!"_

_Francis then got everyone's attention with a smirk, "Alright, everyone, if Arthur loses this game of strip poker, he has to dress up as one of the Doctors from Doctor who and go to a convention!"_

_Arthur glared at the Frenchman with a determined look in his eyes, "You're on, ye bearded bassturd!"_

_Francis smirked with a flip of his hair, "_Fantastic_~ Well, _Allons-y_, mon ami!"_

_Arthur rolled his eyes at the joke Francis made while the rest of the BTT sniggered at it's cheesiness and he bit out sarcastically, "Geronimo."_

End of flashback.

... To say the least, the game did not end well for Arthur. Along with the fact that the Frenchman was actually _blackmailing_ Arthur into doing this.

So, here he is now. At a convention. Waiting for Francis and the others. Dressed as the 10th doctor. _Motto Bene_, Arthur thought sarcastically.

When Francis arrived at least 20 minutes late, dressed as the 11th doctor, with a Hispanic woman on his arm that was dressed as River Song and the other two members of the BTT having Gilbert dressed as the 9th doctor and Antonio, surprisingly, dressed in normal clothing, Arthur was fuming.

Arthur decided he didn't even want to bother with Gilbert or Antonio, so he addressed Francis, "Where the bloody hell were you? You're 20 minutes late! And who is she!?"

Francis smirked, "This is Reina. The woman I met when we went drinking, remember?"

Arthur glared at Francis, "Of course I don't bloody remember! I was absolutely pissed, _remember_?"

Francis took on a faux thoughtful expression, "Hm, oh, oui. I remember. That was the same night you were brutally beaten in strip poker, am I correct?"

Arthur let out a noise akin to a growl, "I was _drunk,_ you frog! I wasn't thinking straight! I don't even remember playing strip poker!"

Francis grinned, "Oh? Well, I was quite certain to film and take as many pictures as possible to make sure you wouldn't back out of our bet, if you don't remember me showing all of that to you? Oh, and let me just say that you were quite a fine sight to see, though I may not like you, rosbif."

Arthur was about to hurt his French frenemy when Reina beat him to it by punching him in the shoulder and scolding him as Francis winced and held his shoulder, "What did I tell you about being perverted?" She then proceeded to rant in a string of Spanish that only Antonio could understand.

Surprisingly, it was Gilbert who intervened, "Alright, I'm too _fantastic_ to just stand here and not explore the wonders of this convention, who's with me?"

Arthur rolled his eyes at the fact that Gilbert replaced awesome with fantastic in an attempt to get into character.

_'How could this possibly get any worse?'_, Arthur thought.

Immediately after they enter the building, the group is greeted by a familiar pair, one of which Arthur knows all too well, that's how.

"Arthur?", Arthur stared wide eyed at the American standing not too far away from them wearing a captain America outfit with a short Japanese man dressed as a random anime character standing next to him.

Yep. Without a doubt, it was his all-American neighbor, Alfred. Fucking. Jones. And Kiku Honda, one of the only people Arthur actually liked.

This day was just getting better and _better_ for him! ... Not.

Arthur stood there with an embarrassed blush on his cheeks that was growing hotter by the second and seemed as if it was burning with the intensity of a dying star.

Arthur had to get out of this situation and quick.

So, what did he do?

Basically, he did what the doctor does and he ran.

Smart move, right?

Nope.

Immediately After Arthur entered a bathroom, he was followed by and American who he hadn't realized was chasing him until that particular moment.

Arthur backed away with a guarded expression, "What do you want, git?"

Alfred surveyed Arthur with an amused expression before bursting out laughing.

Arthur glared daggers at the American, "Ha ha. I'm glad you find this so bloody funny."

Alfred tried to control his laughter, wiping away tears until his laughter quieted down to quiet sniggers, "D-dude... I didn't think you would be here... dressed l-like, well, _that_."

Arthur rolled his eyes, "Ha ha ha. Laugh it up, bloody git."

Alfred grinned at Arthur, "C'mon, you have to admit it's a little funny... You're dressed up like a character from a British TV show!"

Arthur pointed at Alfred's ensemble, "Yeah? Well, y-you're dressed in tights!" Alfred _definitely_ didn't look particularly hot in said tights, nope not at all.

Alfred smirked, noticing that Arthur was kinda checking him out, "Hey, Arthur."

Arthur's emerald green eyes snapped back up to Alfred's blue eyes, "What?"

Alfred's smirk grew wider as he saw Arthur's faint blush, "Are you _Galifree_ tonight? The hero would like to take you out."

Arthur's face grew even redder than it already was as he grew flustered and began to splutter, "W-what!? You, I, you said- What!?"

Alfred began to walk towards Arthur, "Are you an angel? Because I haven't blinked since I saw your face."

Arthur backed up to the wall, speechless. What was this all of the sudden? Was Alfred actually hitting on him!? On _him_!?

Alfred wrapped his arms around Arthur's waist, "Y'know, I've never been to Uranus before. Wanna change that?"

Arthur's face was as red as a tomato, as Antonio would say. He would be lying if he didn't find Alfred's horrible pickup lines at least a little attractive.

"SEXTERMINATE!", Alfred all but shouted before forcefully kissing the Brit he had pinned against the wall.

After a moment, Arthur kissed back.

The kiss grew more and more heated until the both of them needed to breath. Reluctantly, they pulled away, craving more.

After coming to his senses, Arthur pushed the larger man away from him with a furious blush on his face, "I-idiot! You can't just do that!"

Alfred grinned before wrapping one arm around Arthur's waist and whispering in his ear, "I just did."

Alfred then tried to kiss Arthur again only to be pushed away, "Idiot! We can't do that here!"

Alfred pouted while wrapping his arm around Arthur once again, "Fine... But seriously are you free tonight? I would like to continue... exploring the universe, if you know what I mean." Alfred then proceeded to waggle his eyebrows.

Arthur half-heartedly pushed at the American's chest with a blush, "Yes, I'm free, git."

Alfred grinned, "Great! ... Hey, are you the TARDIS, 'cuz when I look into those pretty eyes of yours, I see the stars."

Arthur rolled his eyes, "If you don't shut the bloody hell up, you'll be seeing stars, alright. Not in the good way."

This quickly shut the American up.

The two blondes made their way back to their respective friends to find Francis snogging Reina with a bunch of people taking pictures, a missing Spaniard, and Gilbert flaunting his 'fantastic awesomeness'(great, he put them together) and Kiku standing there awkwardly.

Gilbert was the first to notice their return, "Hey, they're back! Did you have sex?"

Arthur's face immediately turned red, bordering on purple and he profusely denied the accusation as Alfred laughed and said "later".

Gilbert whooped and high-fived the American, exclaiming that Alfred was going to get laid.

Thus, the balance of the universe was returned for no one made any more stupid Doctor Who jokes because Arthur threatened to castrate whoever did.

**The End. **

* * *

**Well, that's that. I'm so sorry I wrote this I'm a terrible person omg. **

**Favorite, Review, do whatever... **

**I'm so sorry. So sorry. **


End file.
